It's My Birthday!

Today is my birthday and I set aside time to do things to reset for my year... before I go celebrate;) So here I am writing for twenty minutes to reflect.

Starting my day early was tough but a good thing, I made some money and started early. Also Droany got me a very sweet and thoughtful gift to use for the day, the Fila's I've been wanting, plus a *long sweatshirt AND a new fanny pack! I'm obsessed.

My birthday comes at a weird time this year. After my sister's EPIC wedding weekend last week, I'm still kind of recovering where I would otherwise hang low this weekend. But her wedding was so much fun that I'm actually pretty hype to keep celebrating!

I really didn't spend much time planning it because I was very busy right before the wedding, and the bachelorette party only a couple weeks before that plus I've been working on a pretty huge project that I've been stoked about but more about that later.

Being around my family so much this year has been so reflective for me.

First, I am so thankful that not only do I have an incredibly fun, supportive, and loving family but I also get to see them and hang out with them. Not all of them, not all of the time but, when we get together, we have so much fun<3

Honestly, seeing all of my family and a lot of my friends, and making new friends with really cool people this past weekend has been enough of a birthday for me. I had so much fun and felt the most like myself than I have in WHILE. What a great way to start 29.

Watching my mom and dad, and both of their sides families has been so good for me. I feel so connected to them and it's so interesting to see our similarities and differences. It's nice to feel like I'm not the only person who does this, or acts like that.

During my time in New York, I have felt very lonely. I've been screwed over by some people who I thought were friends. I've questioned what I think and and gotten really insecure. If I feel different about something than- what feels like- EVERYBODY else, it has made me not like the way I think. New York is tough because there is just so much going on ALL THE TIME. Sometimes it's overwhelming. And maybe age adds to it, only because the older you get the more you go through.

As I was free styling earlier, I realized that's just it. The older you get, the more you go through. But in a good way, it's getting better with age. Because with age, you see more of what you are capable of and what you can handle. I have done things this year that I really didn't think I would be able to do. And because of that, I am stronger. I realize more of my strength and it inspires me to see what else I can do.

I love to spend my birthday doing something very physical, so today I am going to a gymnastics class to celebrate my strong body before I go celebrate.

Quick shoutout though to everyone who has been apart of my journey. I really appreciate all the lessons I have learned- good and bad, easy or hard, embarrassing or comfortable, etc. Many people have influenced me, whether intentionally or not,. (Being a Virgo) I analyze everything and sometimes over analyze things but I'm working on that. Working on letting things go and not being so highly critical of myself (and others).

Still learning about myself and trying to grow into the best version of myself everyday but I'm glad I get to live this life so cheers to the last of my twenties!